Some moments stand out in our life like flowers peering out from concrete. They make our heart dance. They make us smile every time we think back to them. They make us want to collect these memories in a jar and put them on a shelf… or in a moment of spontaneity throw them in the air so anyone passing by can feel them on their skin with a gentle tingle and look up at the sky smiling and left wondering why they’re smiling all of a sudden?
Don’t we all want these moments? Is it even in our hand? Can we multiply these moments for ourselves? Can any moment be magically transformed like Cinderella’s fairy Godmother was just here?
To answer these questions, we need to ask ourselves some more questions. In any given moment are we making the best of every moment we have been blessed with? Even if we were just relaxing and watching TV, have we enjoyed our experience or have we spent half our energy and brain power feeling guilty yet not doing anything about it? If we went out with people, did we try our best to enjoy their company? Often times our minds wander to the past or future or to an imaginary wishful land and we need to bring it back to the present so we don’t miss out on what we do have by wasting our resources in envisioning what we don’t.
This is also called mindfulness, and in trying to practice it I’ve started doing a check on my thoughts every once in a while. If I’m not feeling content, I ask myself a few questions to get to know why I’m feeling anxious or unhappy. These questions include:
- Am I worrying about what others are doing? Am I judging them?
- Am i letting my past experiences hold me back from venturing in the future?
- Am I worried about others judging me or about how I look while I’m doing what I’m doing?
- Do I wish I was doing something else but I have no choice at the moment?
- Am I imagining the worst-case scenario and being fearful of it?
If any of these are true, I know that I’m not making the best of this moment. It means I am reacting to something imaginary with a very real response. I’m letting my fears that may or may not be real take control of me. The same rule applies to worrying about the past because you can’t change it or worrying about the future because you can still change it. As for the present, a simple three step thought process can improve it if needed: 1) stop and check your thoughts, 2) question & weigh evidence for and against them and 3) adjust your thoughts accordingly.
An excellent example that comes to mind is of children playing. They don’t care about others watching them or giving them instructions on how to play. They don’t worry too long over the lego tower falling, they know they’ll just make a new one. If they want you to play with them, they will just ask. When I’m in doubt I ask myself WWKD? (what would kids do?). These are just some of the tools we can use to give a makeover to our present.
I hope you have even more beautiful highlights every single day to add to your collection. xox